Stalking :P

I picked my cousin up from campus today for lunch, and we finally decided on the Chinese buffet. Soon after we got there, we spotted the guys from my work who I had ditched in favor of my cousin. ๐Ÿ˜› Then later, I went to get more sushi, and there was a thick man blocking the sushi counter and filling up his plate. I edged up closer and he turned around: Oh, hiya, Tim! On our way out the door, one of my cousin’s teammates walked in. Everybody eats at the Chinese buffet.

Ginormous class tonight. Several new guys and most of the kickboxers, too. I think 25-30 total. Mat was crowded.

Started with Big John, then Theresa and Purple Belt Buddy. I did better at noticing when the guys were in position to take my back; unfortunately for me, they noticed, too, doh. Did turn my shoulders down after a gift-wrap or two, though I don’t recall that it bought me much. Although, both of them also had a slick transition or two to take the back; I think they both had one where I remember briefly thinking, “What the–? That was magic!”

Drilling was RNC from attacking the turtle. Drilled with Theresa for most of the time until Tim moved Jess over with us.

One more roll, with Will. He pointed out some places where I’d at least been thinking of the right thing but had been off just a bit. I had been so happy about that heavily sprawled hip against open guard, too, but then, oopsie daisies, swept right over. (Didn’t keep myself in the middle, and turned my hip under too far. He did it correctly against me later, and there was no side to dump him to.) Once I tried to flat-out muscle a sweep, lol. I think I wasn’t quite in position to make it happen. He tipped a little… and then had his base again.

Did move with all 3 guys. Right now I’m purposely trying to roll with guys who themselves keep moving during rolls and who will punish my not moving with either pressure or a quick gotcha! submission. Trying to get this slow, analytical brain to use the subroutines and scripts that I know are in there somewhere. Trying to find reaction and feeling; still too much thinking, too much wanting things categorized and labeled before attempting anything.

The color commentator is back in my head and has been for the last week or so. Bah. (Although, at least it’s closer to spazzy Joe Rogan — who generally at least has a good clue of what’s going on, though always too late to actually help me — and not that nincompoop Goldberg.)

There are things I want to say, but I’m not going to. I’m supposed to be not dwelling on things, right? And working out how to write them down is dwelling and worrying. So, sorry, brain, but you might as well dump them all now; you won’t get the satisfaction of writing them down. (You can still remember, at least, who’s on the “Choke Out Please” list.)

Tap? Did you tap? Was that a tap? Did I tap you?

Hi, Will ๐Ÿ™‚ I like rolling with you, too. And that made my day.

At work today, there was a conference call behind closed doors and the sound of a lady on the other end screaming hysterically. The “go live” date is this weekend. I don’t think it’s going to be pretty.

Sore! Ow! My hips hurt! Stiff every which way. Nearly fell down the stairs at work today because they weren’t working right yet. Tired, too. Got to the academy a little later because work kept coming up with one more thing… oh, wait, one more thing! Started trying to loosen up. I jogged around the front mat for a little while. Theresa’s little brother finally asked me why I was walking funny. Great. ๐Ÿ˜› Did a few other drills and stretches; even jumped rope for 1-min intervals. Not loose. Still hurt. No one could make it in early tonight.

Class started with rolling. With Theresa. Then with Brandon, and he said the conditioning last night in the kickboxing class had been rough so he was hurting. He was moving slow and not engaging much, just working for control and places to rest. I did get on top for a bit.

Then with a new guy that Justin had been working with for two rounds. Yay, spazzy new guys. Hm. He tried to just run around everything. Had heard Justin talking about breaking the guard, so I sucked him in to guard to see what he’d do. He tried to drag my arms above my head and pin them. Got one hand free — I was thinking of a pendulum — and then he rolled over and gave me his back. Um, okie dokey. Worked in the RNC. He tapped, looked at me kind of funny, and said, “I need to get some water.” So he ran off the mat to the water fountain. (Justin glanced up from his roll and gave me a look as if to say, “What’d you do?” I just shrugged.) Caught an armbar from the back (he gave up his back easy — I think he said he had some wrestling background), a triangle from mount, and at least one more. Each time he tapped, he’d sit there a moment and give me that funny look again until I asked if he was alright and wanted to keep going. Started slapping the mat a little after a while.

Then he caught a useless guillotine, so I started working around to side control and pulled him up on his side to take the pressure off. He insisted on squeezing it as hard as he could, so I just set in the defense and settled in to waiting out his arms. Justin called time right as he finally decided to let go and move; I sat there for a moment, with him facing away from me, and then patted him on the shoulder and said, “Good job.” He asked, “Are you tapping?” I said, “No, he called ‘time.’ Good job.” His face fell. Sorry, dude, not happening.

Drilling was RNC to the Matt Hughes choke. From RNC, they peel your top arm down. Slide it straight back until your hands touch; gable grip. The elbow of that hand is sticking up — turn it down so it sits along their back. Get your head over on their ear on that side. Now just like a RNC, squeeze in.

One more round of rolling, with Theresa. I’ve got to keep an eye on her trying to muscling things; I play so lightly and without much pressure on her, and I think she’s getting away with doing things wrong. Today she was trying to get me off of mount using the “scrape” escape, but she was trying to lift my knee off the ground with her same-side elbow and knee and wasn’t using the back leg at all. So I just made my leg heavy and didn’t let her get it until she asked why it wasn’t working and I pointed out what she was doing incorrectly. Then I snuck up to knee-on-belly, and she was trying to use one hand to fling me off. I’d inadvertently let her do it once, because I’d had little weight on her and so it was too easy. This time I made sure to put some weight on her 1) to make it actually be a sucky place to be and 2) to make sure she had to escape properly. And yeah, she couldn’t figure it out. So reviewed that briefly.

No one wanted to stick around tonight. Meh. I need work, people.

One inch forward, miles & miles backwards

During college, my best friend named my early morning incoherence “The Beast” and my growling tummy “Fluffy” (after the three-headed dog in Harry Potter). She cured me of lots of my social anxieties, but lately I’ve noticed that I’m becoming downright hostile when certain people show up to class. I don’t even have to work with them, but my hackles raise and I’m on edge as soon as they walk in. I don’t like them, and I don’t like that I don’t like them. (I think they’ve done things to totally deserve my not liking them or wanting to be around them, but still, I don’t want to be an immature little brat [well, no more than I already am].) I’ve decided to name this grouchiness The Gorgon.

The Gorgon was out in full force tonight.


Went walking at lunch. Got almost to the turnaround point, and it started raining. Bah.

Nothing worked at work. Data has mysteriously disappeared, and no one will fess up to it.

Happy moment: Best friend called at the end of the day and officially asked me to be her maid of honor. Yay, she’s getting married! Now I just need to figure out what all I need to do…

Adjustment with Dr. Tom. Next week I go down to 2x/week, so that’s good.

No one came early tonight, so nothing there. Class was small, with a new guy who claimed to have no experience and yet did. (Why? I don’t get it. And once the boys figured it out, which didn’t take long, he got fed to higher belts who had no mercy.)

With Will to start. Excuse me, excuse me — why is this boy yanking on my arms and knocking me over? What is this all about? “Jiu-jitsu,” you say? What’s that? Ow, that hurts… So, um, yeah. It was as if I knew nothing at all. Fell in to some seriously stupid stuff to get caught in.

Then a round with Scott. Still in Wonderland, but he claimed I had good shoulder pressure at one point. And I did use that sweep that Justin and Will worked with me on last Friday. He laughed when I got it and asked where I’d learned that. I also “saved” him as another pair came crashing down toward his head; picked him up and pulled him over just in time. Then we moved far away. At least my reflexes worked when it was important.

Drilling was RNC. I drilled it a few times with Will, until Theresa joined the class, and then let her drill it on me.

(By the way, when the instructor asks, “Are there any questions?”, this is not the time to call out to a guy across the room: “Hey, so-and-so, did you get a haircut?” You. Are. An. Idiot. And are not funny.)

Rolling, with Theresa first and then with Guillaume. He was being wiggly and energetic. I tried to D’Arce him several times, but guess I didn’t quite have his top arm in position. Tried to transition from D’Arce to Big Poppa to D’Arce to guillotine, but apparently did it all wrong as none were anywhere near anything. Saw a triangle but couldn’t lock it in; went to an omoplata but he rolled before I could catch him; flopped around and missed the armbar from the end. Couldn’t do anything from north/south kimura-land. Meh.

A couple of the guys were going to do some conditioning after class, but I felt too lethargic to join them. I need it, though: so weak. *le sigh*

The Stupid Side

I got locked out of my office at noon. I took a walk, as I usually do, but didn’t take my keys because someone’s always there. No today — lots of folks traveling or on vacation, so when they left to go to lunch, they locked the doors. Thankfully, the intern came in not too long after and me let in.

Another adjustment tonight. I’m still going 3x/week right now. They’ve found two big, ropey knots in my back, near or just below the bottoms of my shoulder blades; they run perpendicular to the muscle fibers. Today they started attacking those with e-stim, too.

Will met me before class, and we rolled for about 40 minutes again. I lost my legs to lots of heel hooks, toe holds, and kneebars; also lots of RNCs in there and a couple of armbars. Lots of tapping. I know, he’s a purple belt and it’s for real; I just still feel as if I ought to be able to do more, but I just get toolbagged, and it’s frustrating. Not because he does anything wrong, but because I can’t do anything right; I’m always out of position and always doing the wrong thing. Sure, he baits it, but shouldn’t I at least get something right? Meh.

Also, for whatever reason, I couldn’t seem to stop poking him in the face, kneeing him in the face, kneeing him in the groin. No fine motor skills functioning whatsoever. I’m still feeling lethargic today. Maybe I need to try to eat more, I dunno…

Small class tonight, and not too many that I want to train with. Rolling to start. Will and I continued where we’d left off. Then some drilling triangles from guard. I remembered fine to one side, but then the stupid side couldn’t get any part of this right. Gah. He tried to help, but it still didn’t go so well.

Rolling again, and I got stuck with a spazzy white belt whose idea of fun tonight was to ram his elbow into my throat. Thanks, dude. Did finally find a pass, though he grabbed and tried to squeeze to stop/submit me; waited him out with some annoyed pressure, then actually had a decent side control and then mount, though couldn’t find anything from mount. Another round, with Scott. He’s working his top game this week, so I didn’t see much daylight.

Drilling again, side control escapes. With Scott. Justin said I was doing it right, but too slow — step 1, … … and then step 2, … and then… Meh. Couldn’t seem to quite get it together; when I got fast enough, I screwed it up.

Rolling again, with Theresa, who’d joined the class very late. Then a round with Sundance. I had to tap to a body triangle *pout*. There was an over-the-jaw RNC involved, too. *double pout* He got lazy and let me pass to side control. I had a short burst of energy and clear-headedness, and went for the Big Poppa. He said he thought he was safe, so he even moved deeper in to it, thinking he would practice his escape. And then he realized that it was too deep and that I actually had done it correctly, and that ended that.

One more round, with the normally stinky guy, and he actually didn’t smell too bad tonight. (Breath was still bad, but there was not the usual cloud of smell surrounding him.) And once more, I had no clue what to do. From butterfly, I knew I wanted to sweep, but I couldn’t think of how to do anything. Nothing I went for seemed right; everything felt like it was out of position. I must have managed a sweep or something, because I remember passing his half guard and ending up in mount again for a while, but still had no clue what to do once I got there.

Seems as if having >3 days off didn’t do much for me. I’m out of sync and tired before I even did anything. Grr.

A new girl, indeed

The new girl, April, did show up this morning. She’s a few inches shorter than me and about 20-30 pounds heavier. And she wants to fight. She’s been training at an “MMA fitness” school because it’s cheaper and promotes weight loss as their big thing, but they don’t really spar and they don’t even roll. Very little ground work. The other women there aren’t interested in fighting or getting hit or going hard, so she was worried about hurting me this morning.

She said she’d seen us training at our old location in the strip mall and had noticed that there was 1 girl in the class and that the girl had muscles on her legs like she wanted. Lol. She’d been wanting to start training for about a year but had wanted to lose weight first. Then she found the “MMA fitness” place, which is just a block or so from our current location and is cheaper. But after finding out that the “MMA fitness” place doesn’t train fighters (at least they were upfront about it), she started looking around again. She said she’s often the only one there, and the only one who comes consistently, and she’s already ready to jump in to 2-a-days and every days.

Adam put us through a short warmup, with shrimping drills at the end. She’d never done that, so we spent a lot of time teaching her that and then showing her how to use it. Then she and I sat down to roll, and she was very hesitant because she’d never done it before, aside from playing around with her brother and boyfriend. All the rolling that she’d seen between two boys looked even more violent that she wanted — at the gym where she lifts, there’s a group of guys who get together to “trane UFC,” and they apparently slam each other a lot and all leave class bloodied up. She was worried both about her hurting me and about me hurting her, lol. Adam and I both promised her that she wouldn’t break me and that I’d go easy on her.

That round was mostly me keeping her in guard and letting her try to break it. I was trying to sweep, too, but she does have a good base and strong legs, so that was hard while also trying to go a little easy. Still, she was wearing herself out pretty good. She bopped me in the face a couple of times with errant hands and elbows and started to apologize profusely, but I shrugged it off, which she said would never happen at her other school. Found a pendulum sweep eventually, since she was pushing forward a lot, and her eyes lit up and she said, “What was that?! You’ve gotta teach me that!” Let her shrimp back to guard. Got her back in my guard, another sweep, shrimp again.

Then Adam showed a crucifix-esque sweep to RNC. They shoot and get your leg. Get your hands over/under, with the under on the side they’ve attacked. Sprawl back heavy to break their grip, then gable grip your hands to pull their arm up. Sit in again, baiting them to go for that leg again while you actually sit through to half guard. Now they’re pulled in deep, with the arm you aren’t holding trapped under your leg. Lockdown or otherwise lace your feet over the leg you’ve got. Now you’re in half guard, and they’re twisted around because you’ve got the far arm pulled over their back. Switch your arms around, shooting deep each time, to pull/roll them further on their back until you have their back and a clear shot at the RNC. (Their one arm is trapped under your leg; their other is controlled by your one arm.) Second hook in and finish.

A little tricky, and I did it right first and then did it very wrong for a while. Bah. Needs works.

Then one more round of rolling. Back to keeping her in guard, but also being slightly more aggressive with sweeps and trying to take her back. Got there a few times for RNCs, and to mount a few times for her to shrimp again. She’s strong! — I had an armbar, and she just picked me up. She stood up another time when I got her back. She does grab and squeeze a lot, but we’ll fix that.

Afterwards, Adam and I stayed around to talk to her. She really does want to fight, so we explained why training here for both morning and evening classes is going to be better than doing any kind of “fitness” class. She might do it. Gracious, with all these womens signing up, we might could start an actual women’s class! We’ve got six of us now that come, though a few are very sporadic. Hmm, something to consider…