BJJ Grrl

"Be gentle, kind and beautiful, yet firm and strong, both mentally and physically." ~Sensei Keiko Fukuda

Still fluff

on November 6, 2013

Oi, can hardly hold a thought in my head. This sucks…

Short warmup, then rolling to continue. Trying to direct my brain & body into this whole “grappling” thing was nearly impossible. Couldn’t hold thoughts in my head; they flew off like fluff. Where am I? What am I trying to do? I have no ideas… Efforts to rally myself went nowhere. Mehhhhhhhhh. Meh.

Then partnered up for specific sparring from half guard. Top, pass only. Bottom, choke only. (Choke? From bottom half? I, er… huh? Except then everyone else seemed to know some chokes from there, as I got choked often. So.) The fluff began to scatter even further. I know how to pass half-guard, but I think I just tried to mash all the passes together and instead created a mess of fairly epic proportions. The one thing I focused on on the bottom was not getting flat. I even muttered it out loud so I would be sure not to forget. Partners probably thought I was nuts. Oh well.

(And don’t you love the guy who sit downs and says, “Wow, I’m soooo tired” — because you know he’s going to come out even harder than his normal 100%? Doesn’t fool me anymore, just warns me what’s coming.)

Tim asked me what was wrong at one point; my face probably looked sour. (Also pinched and squashed, as I’d tightened up the straps on the headgear so I wouldn’t end up looking out the earhole again.) I said I was grappling like an idiot.

Finally, more rolling. Blasted fluff. Might have appeared semi-decent because they were going very easy on me. Still a lot of fluffy brain, though.

I may have done one thing right, after Buddy let me take his back and start working for the collar choke from there. He likes to wait as long as he can before starting to escape (once he’s finally let me fight through to actually set something up), so he knows how long he has when rolling with the other guys. But apparently when I trapped his arm with my leg and/or simultaneously focused on straightening my wrist, I did just enough and ended with a deep, finished choke set — and then I heard a choked gurgling and his eyes seemed to be transfixed on the ceiling. I let go, but he didn’t move. Oh. Oopsies. He woke up a few moments later and seemed to be okay. Said he’d dreamed that he’d either tapped or escaped, but I had been expecting both (though knowing my own abysmal success with finishing, I expected the latter more) and neither had actually happened. So that last round ended a little early for us while he recovered. And laughed about it, and recovered more.

(That is the first time I’ve ever choked anyone out, too. Freaked me out, yep.)

That incident broke the downward, self-incriminating spiral my thoughts had taken. Then Tim reminded me that “a bad night on the mats is still a good night.” So by the time I left last night, I had shaken off most of the funk. No idea yet if the fluff has been recaptured and molded back in to something resembling a brain.

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