BJJ Grrl

"Be gentle, kind and beautiful, yet firm and strong, both mentally and physically." ~Sensei Keiko Fukuda

Where did my jiu-jitsu go…?

on August 4, 2009

Today: 5 months at the new job
Last night: 16 months of jiu-jitsu

But I hope in this that I am an anomaly and that no one else’s jiu-jitsu looks like this after 16 months. Because this is pathetic and sad and more than terrible. 16 months of steady practice, of extra practice, of everything that everyone else has done and more… and I’m worse off than always-his-first-day guy.


  • side control escape
  • pendulum sweep
  • cut-through guard pass
  • upa

And I did none of them. Remembered them. Did none of them.

We started with rolling. We might as well have had a make-’em-puke warmup: I was just as effective and as with-it as if we had. Started with Sundance. Basically forgot how to do jiu-jitsu. Couldn’t even defend anything right. Nice, slow, technique roll, too. Nothing. Got caught lots. Couldn’t defend even when I knew it was coming.

Will next. Same. They were rolling slow, they were leaving me space, and I couldn’t do anything about it.

Drilling. Move of the week: cut-through guard pass. Concentrated on getting my hips through like Justin had showed me last night, but then messing up the rest of it. Then step-over/spinning armbar from side control. Have done this before, but took me most of the rest of the time to finally get it right once.

Rolled with the guy I’d drilled with. Still no jiu-jitsu. I saw a few things — “Oh, if I can get an underhook here, I can take his back” — but then couldn’t figure out how to do them. (Underhook? What’s that? This arm? No, no, try the other… … Hmmm. Wrong hip? Let’s switch… … … easier said than done… Hmm, I don’t think I want to be flat — ugh, shoulder pressure — yeah, I don’t like flat… but how do I get out…? Okay, got that underhook on the other side… Um, wrong hip? Now what?) I did think about the pendulum sweep, and even got one arm across and trapped, and then just sat there staring at him, unable to figure out what comes next… He turned himself and gave up his back at one point — no, two points — and I absolutely could not figure out what to do. Not even a RNC…

I was going to sit out the last roll, since Justin was also out keeping time. But he came in to roll with me. Didn’t need his super powers; could’ve done it all with one finger. I may have had a few moments where something sparked, where I almost thought of doing the right thing or may have moved in the right direction. But those were lost in a crowd of “What the heck am I doing?” moments. He caught me lots, too, to point all those mistakes out. Rolls like that are when you want to apologize profusely for wasting someone’s time.

After, did some gi pullups, some straight on and some cross grip. The cross grip ones, I’d get a pullup and as I came down my arms would slowly twist open so I was facing backward by the time I finished.

At work, not much to do. Some editing of the document we turned in last week (they’re considering completely re-doing the call flow) and one incident to investigate, but mostly nada. So I updated my Blogroll page.

By the way, I posted a new Progress Report over the weekend, if you’re interested. Not much has changed since last time, though, except I’m really starting to acknowledge how wiped out I am. I think, before I started my current job, I had a lot more recovery time (and especially the months when I was unemployed!). Even at my previous job, the last few months I was there, I was coming in later because I had no work to do. And yet I’m trying to sustain the same — or greater — workload without increasing recovery. Yeah, so, not working.


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