Crummy with titles tonight

So instead I ran off and read the rest of the internet when I should have been typing. Well, there it is. A title, I has it.

Last night was my brother’s birthday. My family went out to dinner, so no training — and, I’m supposed to be holding myself back on Tuesdays and Thursdays anyway. Thursdays are easy, because it’s MMA night and I’m tired of getting hit in the face and am really not excited about stand-up at all right now. Tuesdays are hard, because it’s jiu-jitsu. *le sigh*

Went to a good (and expensive) place that my brother likes, and we all ate way too much. The manager is a friend of my brother’s, so he sent out three appetizers — oysters, beer-battered shrimp, and pan-seared tuna — heavenly! A bread basket of fresh-made sourdough bread. Ooooooh…. Then large salads all around before the main course, which is also huge. And the best mashed potatoes, made with real cream. My dad and I ordered dessert (brownie & ice cream for him, cheesecake for me) because they hand-make them all. And the manager sent out a piece of chocolate cake (OMGSOGOOD!) with a candle on it for my brother. My brother’s usually a protein-powder-&-oatmeal or chicken-&-brown-rice guy, but even he ate mashed potatoes and chocolate cake last night.

Anyway, I decided that I would make today an intermittent fasting day since I probably ate enough calories last night to fuel a whole week. Even before that meal, I’d been feeling as if I needed to focus on losing weight again; I feel as if I’ve gained a lot of weight back, and I’m not happy about it. (125 weigh-in at NAGA excluded. That day, I’d eaten a light breakfast and then fasted the rest of the day. Not really on purpose, just mostly nerves, and somewhat afraid of some-way-some-how ending up over 135. I’m a nut. Have I mentioned that yet?) Clothes that fit a few months ago are starting to get a bit tight in places they weren’t tight before. And there were a few documentaries on TV this weekend about people who weighed 600lbs or more, and those always make me want to pay attention to my diet on the off-chance that something I eat today will make me look like that tomorrow. And since I’ve been feeling over-tired, as if I’m overtraining for what my body can currently handle, and so am looking to build in two extra rest days a week, now would be a good time to focus on eating less since I’m working out less.

Erm, detour, sorry. Back on track. Got through breakfast fine — did have coffee (Caffeine: It’s not a drug, it’s a vitamin) — and was doing fine on water and tea all morning at work. And then the CEO shows up. He works out of the NOVA office, but he’d come down here today for some reason, and he wanted to take everyone out to lunch. Can’t say no, so I went out and ate. *le sigh* I’ll get back on track here… eventually….

Class tonight. (Yay, jiu-jitsu, finally! All that talk of food was making me hungry again.) Small again; still Spring Break. Light warm-up, keeping up just fine. Then a round of rolling.

Rolled with Adam since we had an odd number. He was D’Arcing me silly again, and then he stopped and pointed out what I was doing that was leaving me open to them — when he gets side control or half-guard, I’m trying to turn toward him and shrimp out, like I’m supposed to, only I was extending my arms to push my head away, which opens up lots of space for him to zip through. So, elbows in, arms not extended on that. (Should also help with the bridging/shrimping issues I’ve noticed — my head pops up to watch what’s going on, which brings my shoulders up, which means I’m not pushing through my shoulders again. Evolution from the last issue with shoulders and shrimping…) Did get to work it a few times, too, because he was easily getting back to side control or half-guard. He also caught a triangle, so I started to posture up, so he went for the inside arm to armbar it, and posturing up there is then bad because you give away your arm even more. So then he walked me through first making sure to grab my own trapped arm with the free arm, on armbars or triangles, and pulling it in tight before trying to posture up or stack.

Drilling next. Two rounds of rolling next. Scott first. And I suddenly knew jiu-jitsu. For however long that round was, I knew jiu-jitsu. I was hitting sweeps I haven’t hit in a long time, if ever, in live rolling. I had pressure. I got the top. I had knee-on-belly and I kept it (at least for a little while). I could pass anything. I was fast. I was transitioning. I was baiting him!!! I even had him backed into full defense for a few short moments. It felt awesome. He sat up afterwards and high-fived me, and said that was excellent.

Then I rolled with a white belt, and I couldn’t do anything. Er… what? He pulled guard first, so I thought, “Here’s a chance to work my guard break.” Not so much. Too busy keeping my arms from getting pulled across his body to set up armbars and triangles, too busy getting my hands bumped off even with my full body weight on them, too busy getting swept even though I had my base solid. Then mounted and trying to keep my arms from getting ratcheted up to an armbar. Tried reversing a few times, but he didn’t move. Brain was thinking, “Okay, wait, just roll like you did with Scott.” … Except, as far as I could tell, I was. Fighting off the frustration, just trying to work what was in front of me, and not really getting anywhere. Did use Adam’s tip for armbars/triangles to defend a few times, so I suppose there was that.

But it’s just… I dunno. Scott outweighs this guy by 30 lbs, and is a blue belt, and is a lot stronger. And I know he wasn’t going as full-out with me as he would with a guy his size, but I do know he’s turned up the pressure and speed on me since the tournament; he even said he was going to, on every roll. I have to work for everything; my pressure and position have to be good or he slides right out; I know he isn’t just giving everything up. I wasn’t tired (actually wanted to keep going, but everyone else was done and leaving). I went from flying high to crashing & burning, and I don’t know why. Grrr.


4 thoughts on “Crummy with titles tonight

  1. Isn’t that frustrating? How can that happen? Happens to me a lot– except my “I know jiu jitsu” moments are more like “I know a little more than nothing” compared with the “I know nothing” moments.

    Connecting the dots. Growing good neural pathways. Patience. 🙂

  2. There’s a black hole in the middle of my dots. 😦 And possibly in my brain. I guess *something* has connected, because I can remember and do things with Scott, but with most everyone else it seems as if I know nothing. I like consistency — why can’t I just be consistent? Good or bad. At least then I wouldn’t leave class with such a conundrum. Grr.

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